Friday 15 May 2009

Blowing my own trumpet

Because if you don't, why should anyone else?

I've been feeling a little introspective this week...

Maybe it's because my parents have been away and it's the first lengthy spell of alone time I've had in ages. Maybe it's because of the miserable weather. Maybe it's because of misunderstandings and misconstruances. Whatever it is, I'm dragging myself out of it right now. And, to start, I'm following Smidge's lead and giving myself 5 compliments. Because, you know what, I deserve them and how you can expect anybody else to compliment you if you can't do it yourself?

1) I'm incredibly caring and loyal. I really am. If I let you into my life and trust you, I'll do anything in my power to be there for you and make sure you're happy. I regularly go out of my way to support the people who mean the most to me. Whether that's a phone call, a simple 'are you ok?' text message, or a car journey to see them, I do it. Gladly.

2) I'm completely non-judgmental. Tell me anything. Go on. I won't judge you. It's just not my style. I may giggle, I may give you a withering look, but there's nothing you can tell me about something you've done that will make me think any less of you. Unless it's murder or something. That's not cool.

3) I've changed myself into a person I actually love. It took a long time to get here but I'm finally proud of the person I am. I'm not perfect, who is? However, in the space of six months, I've overhauled myself to such an extent that the sincerity of it has been questioned. But the questions are completely unfounded. Contrary to popular belief, people can and do change. I may have my off days but I can genuinely say, without a shred of doubt, that I am now completely honest, both with myself and others, at all times. There is not one word that comes out of my mouth that I don't wholeheartedly mean. I've turned myself into an optimist, always seeing the glass as half full, and I find so much joy in life these days.

4) I'm honest about my feelings. I believe in telling someone how I feel. I wear my heart on my sleeve and, although there are negatives to this, at least I'm honest about my feelings. I don't hide parts of myself away for fear of looking weak or pathetic. What you see is what you get. I cry, I get upset, I'm immature to the point of ridiculousness. If I do these things in front of you then it means I trust you, be thankful for that. I don't see natural human emotions as a sign of weakness and, if people show me their fleshy underbelly (oo-er), it only endears them to me more.

5) I'm a witty beast. No really, I am. Humour used to be a defence mechanism for me back in the bad old days. Not so much these days. I have an extensive vocabulary and I know how to use it. The ability to indulge in word play is, to me, one of the most attractive qualities a person can possess. It's geeky, it's intelligent and it's downright sexy. Throw wordy witticisms at me and I'll most likely be your friend for life.

I actually really enjoyed that. I think that being British discourages us from taking a long hard look at ourselves and pointing out our strengths, not just our weaknesses. We're a self-depreciating nation who find it difficult to stand up and say just how fabulous we are. Well I demand that it stops, now. So....

What do you love about yourself?