Wednesday 18 May 2011


Dudes. I'm getting fat. Again.

It's hard for me to write this but I'm eleven pounds heavier than I was before Christmas. ELEVEN POUNDS. This displeases more than you can ever know. Hence why I'm putting it out there on THE INTERNET. So that it forces me to sort myself out and step away from the takeaways. Since I've been living on my own it's just become all too easy to order in, rather than make the meals that I know are good for me. I've finally got to the point where I'm disgusted with myself so it's onwards and upwards from here.

I did the Great Manchester Run on Sunday and, whilst I was pleased to finish it at all (I've never been a natural runner), I was annoyed with myself for not training enough and for not finishing in a good enough time. I'm ridiculously competitive at times and am infuriated that I didn't do it in under an hour. I totally loved the experience though and I think I might actually adore running a little bit now.

It's seven and a half weeks until I go on holiday (MARBS <3) and so I have a plan. This plan is called exercise. Lots of it. Oh, and eating well, obviously.

With that in mind I started the 30 Day Shred today and, whilst it wasn't quite as hard as I expected it to be, I know that my thighs will be agony in the morning. Jillian Michaels is my nemesis for the next 30 days and beyond. I have a bit of a girl crush on her actually. SHOUT AT ME JILLIAN, PLEASE. Ahem. I'm also signed up for a 5k in three weeks time and I'd really like to do it in under 30 minutes. I'm being badgered by my friend T to do a ten mile run in October and am seriously considering it. RUNNING WILL SAVE ME.

I'm bored of being flabby, bored of being overweight and bored of feeling rubbish about it. My body confidence actually soared towards the end of last year. I was thinner than I'd been in about 15 years and felt amazing. A few words sent me crashing right back down and that's where I've been ever since. Hence the takeaways. When I feel rubbish, I eat rubbish. It's the ultimate vicious cycle.

But I'm done with it now.